Note: I wrote this in December and was apparently too overwhelmed to publish. Maybe it can be of use to someone in 2016?
The holidays are happening again and I am getting asked the age old question, "What should I get your child?" Hmmm. Good question. I don't even know. So I Googled "gift ideas for Autistic children" and looked around. Autism Speaks has product links, various toy stores have lists and links, and then I clicked on some website....like "cafemom.com" something or other. It was giving advise on "gifts to give that Autistic kid on your Christmas List." I honestly have no words for that. It was such an uninformed, idiotic title. What do you get any other neuro-typical kid? Oh, things they are interested in! This is no different. Okay, so there might be a couple of things that are different that you might want to consider but "that Autistic kid"? As a parent, it stung. Ow. At first I wanted to contact them and tell them I was a parent of "that Autistic kid" on the list and give them an education on how they could better approach the subject, but I didn't. I decided to offer my suggestions to the Google Gods instead. A few words before my ideas...
First, Autistic children do not differ in neuro-typical children in terms of want. Do not minimize their inclusion in the holiday and gift giving process because they cannot speak or act uninterested. The very nature of them being Autistic implies they aren't good at social cues, facial expression, and/or verbal communication, etc. So just keep that in mind. Second, the parents of Autistic children vary in their parenting styles and therapy choices. For example, with my child, I opt to challenge him, broaden his experience by not enabling repetitive behavior (stimming). I steer away from preschool toys (which he LOVES and stims on) for more age appropriate choices fulfilling the same "LOVE" requirement. So talk to the parents. Third, and keep this in mind, the very nature of Autism and it's repetitive choice pattern kind of means a lot of the same kinds of toys at Christmastime. For a parent this is overwhelming and, actually, it overwhelms the Autistic child as well. (I actually had one Christmas where my daughter just sat for 15 minutes staring at what Santa had brought. I didn't know it at the time, but she was overwhelmed.) Did I already mention, talk to the parents?
1. Any toy that physically engages the child is good! Large bounce balls, small therapy balls, swings, balance beams, etc...
Autism Products has a lot of these items. Browse for ideas, follow up on Amazon, etc for price comparisons.
2. Toys with movement or educational toys. Fat Brain Toys is my 'go to' at the first of the season. There are a lot of non-electronic choices there and they have a broad spectrum of toys for special needs. Look for things with movement like marble runs, disc rollers...it's why hot wheels are timeless. The cars roll and move down a track.
3. An eWriter. BoogieBoard is a brand of ewriter. I think this is the coolest thing. My kids love them and it's fairly inexpensive (as electronics go). It's probably more of a grandparent-grandchild gift, or close relative in terms of expense.
4. Dominos. They are tiles, they have dots, colors. You can line them up and knock them over, or you can actually count the dots and play either way, they store relatively easy. Dice and playing cards also go in this category. It depends on the child. Ask the parent.
5. Cash for Savings. This is probably the most useful. Many parents are constantly being told to plan for our child's future. But the expenses of the present don't allow a lot of luxury to save. Since my children don't really want much, relatives often give money. I have opened savings accounts for them, that way the money will be there in case one or both (I pray) goes to college.
6. An Activity. My son LOVES bowling. He won't sit in a movie theater and restaurants can be challenging, but throwing something and knocking a bunch of stuff down is right up his alley! (pun intended) I realize few will do this, but maybe grandparents, aunts/uncles may consider.
7. Magazine subscriptions. A subscription to Highlights, Scientific America, or other magazine featuring their interest is a phenomenal way to get a child excited to walk to the mailbox and get a little exercise.
8. iTunes or GooglePlay card. Check with the parent as to which would be more appropriate. It depends on the device.
9. Art supplies. Check with the parent so you know the skill level and ability of the child.
If you read this and are actively TRYING to find a gift for your Autistic loved one, I applaud you! It gets exhausting trying to explain to people that you have to apply the same gift giving strategy you use for any other neuro-typical child to the Autistic child. It's all about their skill level and interests. Which is what you have to find out about any other child. I hope this helped someone out there in WebLand.
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